amoying: frappuccinos are good until you finish 90% of it and all that’s left is watery clumps that taste like cream and sadness
kellyykao: katear: i-fuck-nuns: ...
You know, the Bible doesn’t teach us to be defensive in relationships. It...– Myunghwa Choi, ”Loneliness Unmasked” sermon (via breanna-lynn)
mcsnuggie: true self control is waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn
What if I walked up to Robert Pattinson when he...
dobbyfredsirius: drkarayua: silent-renegade: I strongly believe that man would actually start crying Didn’t you hear about that time he was being swamped by twihards for autographs screaming EDWARD EDWARD and he ignored the fuck out of all of them. But then someone yells CEDRIC and that person is the only one who left with an autograph that day. and only one fuck was given that day
Rejection doesn't hurt, expectation does. Lying...
yanilavigne: (Quotes here)
videohall: What if animals were round?
Isaac: Augustus Waters was a self-aggrandizing bastard. But we forgive him. We forgive him not because he had a heart as figuratively good as his literal one sucked, or because he knew more about how to hold a cigarette than any nonsmoker in history, or because he got eighteen years when he should've gotten more.
Augustus Waters: Seventeen.
Isaac: I'm assuming you've got some time, you interupting bastard.
Isaac: I'm telling you, Augustus Waters talked so much that he'd interrupt you at his own funeral. And he was pretentious: Sweet Jesus Christ, that kid never took a piss without pondering the abundant metaphorical resonances of human waste production. And he was vain: I do not believe I have ever met a more physically attractive person who was more acutely aware of his own physical attractiveness.
Issac: But I will say this: When the scientists of the future show up at my house with robot eyes and they tell me to try them on, I will tell the scientists to screw off, because I do not want to see a world without him.
*about to get murdered*
murderer: any last words
me: imagine how is touch the sky
*escapes while murderer tries to figure it out*
Best Robbery ever
sclez: tayathestrange: This morning I heard news about the best robbery ever to happen in germany. The emblem of the cookie manufacturer “Leibniz” was stolen from their headquaters: a huge golden Leibniz cookie. A few hours later a video appeared of a guy in a Cookie-Monster-Costume. He blackmailed the Leibniz-Buisness-Group to donate Leibniz-Cookies to all hospitals around the area or...